Self-esteem is a key element in determining a person’s success in life. Simply put, it refers to our perception of ourselves.
Whether we admit it or not, our level of self-esteem impacts how we interact with other people. And our environment, shaping the outcomes we achieve.
It influences our approach to different aspects of life, including relationships, career, health, spirituality, and self-development.
This article examines how high and low levels of self-esteem can affect life outcomes and how individuals can find the right balance of self-esteem to reap its benefits.
What is self-esteem
Self-esteem is the way you view and value yourself. It’s a measure of how confident you are in your abilities, worth, and potential.
Self-esteem is a subjective view and can be either positive or negative. Because how we see ourselves shapes our reactions to situations and it affects how we behave in front of others.
For instance, if we see ourselves as someone lacking in social graces. We may have difficulties building and maintaining relationships.
Similarly, if we hold a high view of ourselves, we may become self-centered, overbearing, and dismissive of others.
Why is self-esteem important?
Self-esteem is important because it affects how we act and react as well as how we approach all aspects of our lives.
This includes our relationships, career, health, spirituality, and self-development.
Thus, having good and healthy self-esteem will have a positive impact on our lives. It can help us communicate better, establish our assertiveness, and become better leaders.
It can also help us forge relationships, adapt, and recover quickly from difficult situations.
How Too Much or Too Little Self-Esteem Affect Our Lives
Having too much or too little self-esteem will have a negative impact on our lives.
The Effects of Having Overly High Self-Esteem
While a healthy level of self-confidence can help you succeed in many areas of your life. Overly high self-esteem can have the opposite effect.
This section discusses the effects of having too much self-esteem and provides examples to illustrate the idea.
Overconfidence
One of the primary effects of overly high self-esteem is overconfidence. When you have an inflated view of your abilities and value. You may believe you are invincible and can accomplish anything.
This can cause you to take unnecessary risks. Make careless mistakes, and, worst of all, fail to recognize your mistakes as such. Thereby missing out on the opportunity to learn from them.
For example, imagine you have too much self-esteem and think you’re a fantastic driver. You might take risks while driving. Such as speeding, tailgating, or texting while driving.
This overconfidence can lead to accidents and endanger yourself and others on the road.
Decreased Empathy
Excessive self-esteem can also lead to a lack of empathy for others.
When you believe you are better than others, you may be less likely to listen to their opinions. Consider their feelings or treat them with respect.
This can damage your relationships and you will find it hard to form new ones.
For example, imagine you have too much self-esteem and think you’re the smartest person in the room. You may dismiss others’ ideas or criticize them for not understanding things as quickly as you do. Making people feel inferior and unheard.
Inability to Handle Criticism
Another effect of having too much self-esteem is an inability to handle criticism.
When you believe you’re perfect, you may take any feedback as an attack on your abilities or character. As a result, you will never improve yourself or learn from others.
For example, imagine you have too much self-esteem and think you’re an excellent writer. When someone suggests you make changes to your work. You may take it as an insult and refuse to consider their feedback. Limiting your growth and potential.
Entitlement
Excessive self-esteem can also lead to entitlement. When you believe you deserve special treatment, privileges, or recognition, you may become demanding and entitled. This can damage your relationships and make it challenging to work with others.
For example, imagine you have too much self-esteem and think you’re the most important person in the office. You may demand that others cater to your needs, interrupt meetings, or refuse to take direction from your boss, which can create tension and conflict.
Risk of Burnout
Finally, having too much self-esteem can lead to a risk of burnout.
When you believe you can handle anything and everything, you may take on more than you can handle and push yourself to the brink of exhaustion.
This can lead to stress, anxiety, and burnout, which can negatively impact your physical and mental health.
For example, imagine you have too much self-esteem and think you can work 24/7 without breaks. You may take on more projects than you can handle. Work long hours and neglect your health and well-being, which can lead to burnout and illness.
Effects of Low Self-Esteem
Having low self-esteem can have a profound impact on your mental and emotional well-being, and can affect every aspect of your life.
Negative Self-Image
Low self-esteem can lead you to have a poor view of yourself. You see yourself as flawed, unlovable, or not good enough.
This negative self-image can lead to a lack of confidence. Not to mention feelings of inadequacy in your life- personally and professionally.
What’s more, this poor image can also lead to negative self-talk. Where you constantly criticize yourself and focus on your flaws and shortcomings.
Social Isolation
When you have low self-esteem, you often have trouble forming and maintaining close relationships.
This may lead you to avoid social situations or interactions. Because of the fear of rejection or judgment from others. This social isolation can further exacerbate feelings of loneliness, anxiety, and depression.
Lack of Assertiveness
Low self-esteem can also lead to a lack of assertiveness, where you struggle to express your opinions, needs, or wants.
With low self-esteem, you find it difficult to stand up for yourself in personal or professional situations. And can lead to feelings of helplessness or powerlessness.
Fear of Failure
People with low self-esteem may avoid taking risks or trying new things because they fear failure or the judgment of others.
This fear of failure can be paralyzing and can prevent you from reaching your full potential.
Examples of Low Self-Esteem
Let’s look at some examples of how low self-esteem can manifest in different areas of life:
Personal Life
- Feeling unworthy of love and avoiding romantic relationships,
- Constantly comparing yourself to others and feeling inadequate,
- Struggling to set boundaries and saying “yes” to things you don’t want to do,
- Avoiding social situations and friendships.
Professional Life
- Feeling inadequate or unqualified for job opportunities,
- Struggling to assert yourself in meetings or negotiations,
- Avoiding taking on leadership roles or responsibilities,
- Fear of making mistakes or taking risks.
Find the right balance
Now that we have learned the negative effects of the extremes. Our goal now should be to find the right balance of self-esteem which is essential for living a fulfilling life.
Healthy self-esteem is the sweet spot between having too much and too little self-esteem. It is a state of mind where you have a positive and realistic perception of yourself.
You are aware of your strengths and weaknesses, and you accept them both. And you neither feel inferior nor superior to others. Instead, you feel confident and comfortable in your skin.
What are the benefits of a good and healthy self-esteem
When you have balanced self-esteem, you experience many positive effects in your life. Here are some examples:
Having healthy relationships
You have positive and meaningful relationships with the people around you because you are not seeking validation or approval from them.
Instead, you are confident in yourself, and you can appreciate the people in your life for who they are.
Being open to constructive criticism.
When you have balanced self-esteem, you are open to feedback and constructive criticism.
You understand that you are not perfect and that there is always room for improvement. Therefore, you can receive criticism without feeling defensive or attacked.
Taking care of yourself.
Healthy self-esteem allows you to prioritize your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Because you know that you are worth it.
So, you exercise regularly, eat healthy foods, and engage in activities that make you happy. And you don’t engage in self-destructive behaviors because you respect yourself and your body.
Risk-taking
When you have healthy self-esteem, you are willing to take risks and try new things.
You don’t let fear hold you back because you believe in yourself and your abilities. Because you are aware that failure is not the end of the world, and you can learn from your mistakes.
Having Confidence and Assertiveness
When you have healthy self-esteem, you believe in yourself, your talents, and your abilities.
This strong belief allows you to speak up and take charge of situations. You voice out what you want in life and pursue your goals.
Being Resilient and Adaptable
Good self-esteem helps you build resilience and adaptability in the face of challenges. You will be better equipped to bounce back from setbacks and cope with stress. Rather than being overwhelmed by difficulties, you’ll be able to stay focused and keep moving forward.
Having Achievements and Success
People with healthy self-esteem tend to achieve more in life. When you believe in yourself, you’re more likely to take risks and pursue your dreams. You’ll be able to set realistic goals and work towards them with confidence and determination.
How to develop a good self-esteem
So now that we are made aware of the positive effects of having a healthy self-esteem. How then do we go from an overly high or low view of ourselves to a point that is just right?
For those in the extreme high, here are the steps that can be done to tone down high self-esteem:
Tone down
- Keep in mind that not everything is about you. Consider other people’s views or opinions. You may even learn something new.
- Listen. There is a difference between hearing and listening. In the former, you are just hearing the sound but not actually understanding because your mind is already formulating a response. The latter action makes you understand the message. Not only will it help you make an informed reply but will also make the other person feel good about themselves. And that is just by listening.
- Know that you don’t know. New learning will always help. So keep learning.
- If you do know, wait to be asked. Unsolicited advice, even a good one will not be appreciated.
- Empathize. Put yourself in other people’s shoes to truly understand what they are going through. If you haven’t been in their situation or have no idea how they feel, just be quiet.
Now then, we will go to the steps on how to bring up self-esteem.
Dial-up
- Know that you have something to share. Everyone has a talent and certainly, you have something that you are good at. Ignore that little voice saying otherwise. Just speak up.
- Slow and steady. Start small. Just like everything else, development takes practice. So if you want to go from zero to hero, you may want to start with a smile. Let other people feel your presence. Build up from there.
- Love yourself. Take care of yourself. Make yourself feel good. The common denominator: yourself. So stop any negative self-talk about yourself and replace them with words of affirmation.
- Learn to say “No.” You may think this is counterproductive because you want people to like you. But saying yes does not have anything to do with being liked. Saying yes to everything will just burden you to over-commit. Then, later on, feel bad about yourself.
By saying “No” you are setting boundaries that should be respected. - Celebrate the tiniest wins. Small wins can boost self-esteem a little higher on the scale. They will also serve as a reminder that you, yes YOU, are developing into one self-assured person.
How is Self-Esteem Related to success?
Self-esteem is a crucial factor in determining an individual’s level of success. Your perception of yourself and your abilities can have a significant impact on your achievements and accomplishments.
With that said, let’s take a deeper look into the relationship between self-esteem and success. In addition, examine how self-esteem can influence your path to success.
Self-Esteem and Confidence
Self-esteem and confidence go hand in hand when it comes to achieving success.
A person with high self-esteem is more likely to be confident in their abilities. As well as their potential for success.
This is because confidence is an essential quality for success. It enables you to take calculated risks, face challenges head-on. And pursue your goals without fear of failure.
When you believe in yourself, you’re more likely to put yourself out there and take chances that can lead to success.
Motivation and Ambition
A healthy level of self-esteem can also motivate you to pursue success.
When you have a positive self-image, you’re more likely to have a sense of ambition. You will also have the drive to achieve your goals.
With drive and ambition, you’re more likely to be willing to put in the effort. You will work to succeed, as you believe that you are capable of achieving your goals.
Resilience and Perseverance
Success is not always a smooth path, and setbacks and failures are bound to happen.
However, individuals with good self-esteem are more likely to be resilient. And persevere through difficult times.
When you believe in yourself, you’re better equipped to handle setbacks and bounce back from failure. Resilience and perseverance are essential qualities for success. As they allow you to keep pushing forward even when things get tough.
Positive Relationships
A person with good self-esteem is also more likely to have positive relationships.
Positive relationships can help you achieve success by providing a support system that can help you reach your goals. It will allow you to receive support and encouragement. Which can boost your confidence and motivation.
Networking
Networking is an essential part of achieving success. And individuals with good self-esteem are more likely to network effectively.
When you have a positive self-image, you’re more likely to feel comfortable. Putting yourself out there and meeting new people.
Networking can help you build relationships with the right people. The kind of people who can provide opportunities for career advancement and other paths to success.
Is Success Everything?
Have you ever heard someone say that success is everything? It’s a common phrase that often sparks a debate. But let’s take a closer look at the relationship between success and self-esteem.
The link between self-esteem and Success
The majority of individuals understand that success and balanced self-esteem go hand in hand. When you have a positive self-image, you’re more likely to take risks, pursue your goals, and persist through setbacks.
You have confidence in yourself and your abilities, which makes you more likely to achieve success.
Is success a competition?
Some people argue that success shouldn’t be viewed as competition. But the reality is, whether we like it or not, we live in a society that values success.
We’re often judged by our achievements and accomplishments. Whether it’s in our personal or professional lives.
Healthy self-esteem leads to success
So, to answer the question: Is success everything? The answer is yes, to a certain extent. Success can reinforce our self-worth. Help us achieve other goals and provide room for growth.
It’s important to remember, however, that success looks different for everyone.
It’s not about holding a trophy or sitting at the bottom of a grand staircase in a mansion. Success should be measured by your own progress and improvement over time.
Conclusion
In conclusion, self-esteem is a vital aspect of our lives that influences how we interact with the world around us. It affects our relationships, career, health, spirituality, and self-development.
It is essential to recognize that having too much self-esteem can lead to negative consequences. Such as overconfidence, decreased empathy, and entitlement.
Similarly, having too little self-esteem can result in a negative self-image. Social isolation, and fear of failure. Therefore, finding the right balance of self-esteem is crucial.
Developing a healthy level of self-esteem involves learning to listen. Learn to empathize and consider other people’s views. It also requires celebrating small wins, learning to say no, and loving oneself. These actions will help build the confidence, motivation, and resilience necessary for success.
In essence, healthy self-esteem leads to success by boosting confidence. Motivation, resilience, and positive relationships.
While success is subjective, where one man’s view of success differs from another. Having your self-esteem in balance is an essential factor in achieving your goals and living a fulfilling life.
Your thoughts and comments are most welcome. Please share them in the comments section below. Thank you.
